Jacob Handley

The Narrator / Barnaby Clutterbuck

Kris Wilson

The Youngling

Gabriella Shulman

Society President / The Alpha

Keira Pratt-Boyden

The Lecturer

Dionysus Wayne

The Flirting Girl

Bruce Donald

The Post Grad Student

Ben Segneri

Jimmy the Student

Ell Davis

The Judgy Flatmate

Aaron Byrne

The Apolitical Pamphleteer

William Simmons

The Alpha Lad